So on friday, we had a really good teaching at our encountering God service. We looked at John 17 and how Jesus asked his heavenly father for three main desires of His. “To be with them” to be with me and to be with you. Jesus desires to be with you. Wow, this just strikes my heart. The perfect sinless Jesus desires to be with me. The second thing he desires is that we see His glory. That we see who he is, and that the inner workings of His heart be made known to us through the Holy Spirit. The last thing he tells His father He desires is that “they love me with the love which you love me, and that they be in me and I in them.” Wow, isn't that intense!? He desires us to love him with the highest love there could possibly be, the love He has for the Father and the Father has for Him. He wants us to share in that perfect love. The depth of the love the Father has for the Son is put into us by the Holy Spirit!
Anyways, after the service they had a kind of altar call thing....for anyone that wants to respond to the call to love God more deeply, or however they put it. This whole loving God and his love for me has been pretty much the main theme in my life during my time here, so of course I went up to the front. As an outward sign of acknowledging my desire and need in this area of my life and also to receive prayer. Tears began to flow almost immediately as I worshipped and prayer before the Lord. Lindsey, the oldest of my room-mates at 22, came up to me and began to pray over me...Lindsey was telling me the things she felt the Lord was speaking to me. She talked about Jesus wanting my everything, not just part of me. And how He won't relent until He has all of me. It was really powerful...I was sobbing again. She said a lot more but that was the main theme of it. Just about God's desire to have all of me and how he doesn't give up on getting all of me. I responded to those things telling the Lord I give him everything....I will follow him with both feet (in reference to the dream I had in China where the Holy Spirit spoke clearly to me).
Afterwards I was pondering and thinking things over...over my time here as I've fallen back in love with Jesus, I'm realizing that He is re-establishing my trust in Him. I didn't realize the extent of my lack thereof until now – as I realize he is restoring it. It involves mainly the aspect of my future, and my relationship with Jordan.
I had been worried and fearful (even though I never really came out and said it) about really truly give my everything to God because I had to make sure things included Jordan just right. I was holding tight to my relationship. As though, through gritted teeth, I could say to the world and everyone around me “I will prove this is right, and I WILL make this happen. Just you wait and see.” What a sad, screwed up way to look at things though.
I was scared. Scared that if I obeyed the passions and desires/callings I felt God put in my heart that I would lose Jordan. So instead, I held him so tight. Praise the Lord that I acted in faith and in obedience to come to IHOP. That was a good step of re-establishing my trust in the Lord. That's where the trust comes in. Trusting that the Lord really truly knows best. (and knowing it in my heart, not just my head). Trusting I don't have to hold Jordan with that death-grip because God is in control, not me. (thankfully!)
My trust is shifting back onto the Lord's shoulders, letting him carry my burdens. I'm trusting that he knows everything, and really knows best. He knows the whole picture, and His plan for me is perfect. Instead of holding so tightly to Jordan and saying no to passions in my heart as a result, I will run with the things the Lord puts on my heart and see where it takes me. I will stay in love with my Savior, for he alone is the reason that I live. And I will trust Him to work things out, in His timing. Who am I to think I know it all, to think my plan is the only way? I am beginning to really learn the truth. The truth that God's will shall come to pass if I walk in obedience to Him. I don't have to make things happen in my own strength. I don't have to defend myself and what I believe God said to me. That's God's job. (basically sounds like a conversation I had with my parents before I left...if only they could have trusted that the Lord would deal with me in His timing and perfect way and trusted that I would be diligent to respond; instead of trying to convince me themselves of what I need to think or do) I need only to love Him with all my heart, mind, and strength, and live in obedience to Him. He will take care of the rest. It's not that my beliefs have really changed, but the trust for making things happen and the way and timing of how things will happen is truly in God's hands now, not mine or Jordan's. I don't have to make God's will happen, he will take care of that. His will shall come to pass if I submit everything to Him. I say not my will but yours be done oh Lord! What do I have to fear, what should I be afraid of? Afraid of living out God's perfect will? No way! And oh how much would I miss if I did things my way. It is only when I give Jesus my everything, with complete trust that His ways are perfect, that I can truly thrive; truly live life. And in His will there is indescribable peace and satisfaction. Taking things one step at a time, in love with my Jesus and trusting Him with everything,
Trisha
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
God's Love - thats what its all about
Through the course of many things, I am really discovering how God's love and returning that love is really what it's all about. We have had teachings and sermons on intimacy and love of God. And the greatest commandment to love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength. Even in my times of stillness before the Lord He was giving me pictures of how much and how He loves me! What a beautiful love it is, He is love! Even many songs we sing focus on it, one that really spoke to my heart contained the lines: “I will return to my first love. I'm so in love with, I'm so in love with you Jesus.” My heart is falling so in love with the beauty of Jesus and being captivated by Him.
He is my everything, my rock and my foundation. Even when everyone and everything else fails me, Jesus will never will. These are things that we all say and hear countless times in our growing up years, but I feel they are becoming realities in my heart. Things I knew in my mind are being engrained as real truths in my heart. I am continually learning how to give those giant mountains completely to the Lord, when there is no way to the right or to the left. “God will make a way, When there seems to be no way.” That phrase of an old song spoke to my heart about 4 or 5 years ago and has never left me, I love to see it becoming reality in my life, and not my life with my parents seeing those truths come to pass, but for me to see it, alone and for myself. God is so good!
I had written in an earlier post about my “dream ministry.” I know I would love to do something along those lines but I also know that no matter where I am in life and in the world, no matter what I am doing; my purpose is to love God, to know Him, to be in His presence. To fellowship with the Almighty Creator is the reason I was made. I know that no matter what I do or where God takes me, I can be satisfied in my love relationship with Jesus. For example, say I do some ministry for a couple years, for a season in my life. It will be exhilarating and exciting to have such an impact. But I want kids eventually. I can honestly say and believe that being a stay at home mom can be satisfying as well. Because what really matters is my relationship with Jesus. I can talk to him and commune with Him always and anytime. As long as that is not neglected, life will be satisfying, exciting, and fresh! :)
I liked the way Stuart explained it to our class when Nathan (a fellow fire in the nighter) asked the question of “How God could empower Samson to kill those men?” It brought up the whole topic of calling on a person's life. A person's calling is not for the person themselves, but for the people around them. Therefore, their calling is not dependent on how perfect of a person they are or if they do everything right. Because its ultimately not about them, but for the benefit of the people. God had an ultimate plan and purpose and He wanted to use Samson as part of that plan. That does not mean that Samson was always righteous and made the right choices. Stuart also brought up how a lot of times people involved with revivals end up having hidden sin in their life and what not, and how people get so judgmental because they believe God couldn't be using him/her because of the problems they have in their life. And just how we need to remember its God's ultimate completion of His plan, not because they were a good Christian and God is rewarding them. Of course, God will only continue to use that person up until a point. If they continue in sin and stray from godliness, He will have to find someone else to finish the job. It's just a good thing to remember when “judging from afar” and also in our own lives. Our calling involves the giftings God has given us and how they can benefit his kingdom and glory, so really they have everything to do with him and the body of Christ.
Our purpose in life, for ourselves is to love God. To have a growing, deepening relationship with Jesus Christ. And to press into the word and the ways of the Holy Spirit. Out of that flows loving others as ourselves and sharing the gospel with those around us. If we work at Mc Donalds our whole life or plant churches oversease, we can still fulfill the purpose of our life. There is no excuse not to, none what so ever. In many ways this seems very backwards or upside down, but just think about it for a while. I believe that you too will see the truth in this. May our God grant you revelation about His perfect love and what it means to love him back.
love,
trisha
He is my everything, my rock and my foundation. Even when everyone and everything else fails me, Jesus will never will. These are things that we all say and hear countless times in our growing up years, but I feel they are becoming realities in my heart. Things I knew in my mind are being engrained as real truths in my heart. I am continually learning how to give those giant mountains completely to the Lord, when there is no way to the right or to the left. “God will make a way, When there seems to be no way.” That phrase of an old song spoke to my heart about 4 or 5 years ago and has never left me, I love to see it becoming reality in my life, and not my life with my parents seeing those truths come to pass, but for me to see it, alone and for myself. God is so good!
I had written in an earlier post about my “dream ministry.” I know I would love to do something along those lines but I also know that no matter where I am in life and in the world, no matter what I am doing; my purpose is to love God, to know Him, to be in His presence. To fellowship with the Almighty Creator is the reason I was made. I know that no matter what I do or where God takes me, I can be satisfied in my love relationship with Jesus. For example, say I do some ministry for a couple years, for a season in my life. It will be exhilarating and exciting to have such an impact. But I want kids eventually. I can honestly say and believe that being a stay at home mom can be satisfying as well. Because what really matters is my relationship with Jesus. I can talk to him and commune with Him always and anytime. As long as that is not neglected, life will be satisfying, exciting, and fresh! :)
I liked the way Stuart explained it to our class when Nathan (a fellow fire in the nighter) asked the question of “How God could empower Samson to kill those men?” It brought up the whole topic of calling on a person's life. A person's calling is not for the person themselves, but for the people around them. Therefore, their calling is not dependent on how perfect of a person they are or if they do everything right. Because its ultimately not about them, but for the benefit of the people. God had an ultimate plan and purpose and He wanted to use Samson as part of that plan. That does not mean that Samson was always righteous and made the right choices. Stuart also brought up how a lot of times people involved with revivals end up having hidden sin in their life and what not, and how people get so judgmental because they believe God couldn't be using him/her because of the problems they have in their life. And just how we need to remember its God's ultimate completion of His plan, not because they were a good Christian and God is rewarding them. Of course, God will only continue to use that person up until a point. If they continue in sin and stray from godliness, He will have to find someone else to finish the job. It's just a good thing to remember when “judging from afar” and also in our own lives. Our calling involves the giftings God has given us and how they can benefit his kingdom and glory, so really they have everything to do with him and the body of Christ.
Our purpose in life, for ourselves is to love God. To have a growing, deepening relationship with Jesus Christ. And to press into the word and the ways of the Holy Spirit. Out of that flows loving others as ourselves and sharing the gospel with those around us. If we work at Mc Donalds our whole life or plant churches oversease, we can still fulfill the purpose of our life. There is no excuse not to, none what so ever. In many ways this seems very backwards or upside down, but just think about it for a while. I believe that you too will see the truth in this. May our God grant you revelation about His perfect love and what it means to love him back.
love,
trisha
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
The Holy Spirit is SO cool! :)
So there is the Global Bridegroom fast going on right now Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. I fasted all day yesterday, ate some today, and will fast tomorrow. On these three days, our classes are canceled. Instead we are in the prayer room from 8 pm until 6 am. We have a half hour lunch break at 1 am. Talk about intense right!?! But how often do you get the chance to spend 9 and a half hours focusing on the Lord, his Kingdom and His goodness; in prayer, worship, reading the word, and soaking in His presence. I am certainly enjoying this privilege, even if I get tired or it gets long at times... :) I actually finished Patricia King's book yesterday during this time as well and am posting this now it is 10:52 pm...
So I went though and read a whole bunch of scriptures about the Holy Spirit and all the things he does for us and the ways he works, there was a list of them in Patricia King's book, and I stumbled upon even more as I went along. I wanted to share some of my favorite with you. I feel like I am drinking it all in, that I can't get enough of scripture!
I love the verse Luke 1:15 and just the thought of John the Baptist being filled with the Holy Spirit while still inside the womb! And if you keep reading, in verse 41 we see that as baby John leaps at Mary's greeting, Elizabeth is filled with the Holy Spirit! How awesome is that!
One of my all time favorites :) John 16:13 & 14
But when He the Spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all the truth; for He will not speak on His own initiative, but whatever He hears, He will speak; and He will disclose to you what is to come. He will glorify Me, for He will take of Mine and disclose it to you. Wow, the Holy Spirit is amazing isn't it?!
Acts 8 tells the awesome story of Philip and the eunuch. Verse 39 and 40 are especially awesome :) “When they came up out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord snatched Philip away; and the eunuch no longer saw him, but went on his way rejoicing. But Philip found himself at Azotus, and as he passed through he kept preaching the gospel to all the cities until he came to Caesarea.” How cool is that!? I want the Holy Spirit to be able to do those kind of things with me!
Then at the end of Acts 10, the holy spirit falls upon all those that are listening to Peter's message. (verse 44). The gift of the Holy Spirit was poured upon them all, and they were speaking in tongues and exalting God. Thereafter, they order them to be baptized in water since they obviously received the same Holy Spirit just as the apostles did! (verse 47 and 48). I just think that's awesome! To have that kind of anointing that your words cause the Holy Spirit to fall on those that hear them!
Romans 8 is a really deep chapter...there is a lot to take in. It's kind of the different aspect of the Holy Spirit. How as believers, we are new creations and must die to our flesh and live by the Spirit. I also like verse 26: “In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” I think that's awesome!
Okay, I guess this can be the last section, I know there is alot! :)
1st Corinthians 2:9-16. I think this is a really good portion of scripture for all believers to meditate and prayer read.
“But just as it is written, things which eye has not seen and ear has not heard, and which have not entered the heart of man, all that God has prepared for those who love Him. For to us God revealed them through the Spirit; for the Spirit searches all things even the depths of God” Wow, does anyone else realize this is incredibly deep. The Holy Spirit searches the depths of God and reveals those secrets to US. Think about that for a moment! What an incredible gift, honor, and privilege!
Continuing on in scripture: “For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the spirit of the man which is in him? Even so the thoughts of God no one knows except the Spirit of God. Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, so that we may know the things freely given to us by God, which things we also speak, not in words taught by human wisdom, but in those taught by the Spirit, combining spiritual thoughts with spiritual words. But a natural man does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually appraised. But he who is spiritual appraises all things, yet he himself is appraised by no one. For WHO HAS KNOWN THE MIND OF THE LORD, THAT HE WILL INSTRUCT HIM? But we have the mind of Christ.” As believers, we must not only be ready for unbelievers to see us and the things that we believe as foolishness, we should expect it and welcome it when it comes. The Kingdom of Heaven does not operate like the Kingdom of this Earth, and praise the Lord for that! What a nightmare it would be if it did...We also need to be careful that never try to instruct the Lord as to what he should or shouldn't do, that is just never our place...
Well I suppose I am done for now...I am just drinking this all in...seriously, how could I ever have been bored of reading the Bible?!?!?!
So I went though and read a whole bunch of scriptures about the Holy Spirit and all the things he does for us and the ways he works, there was a list of them in Patricia King's book, and I stumbled upon even more as I went along. I wanted to share some of my favorite with you. I feel like I am drinking it all in, that I can't get enough of scripture!
I love the verse Luke 1:15 and just the thought of John the Baptist being filled with the Holy Spirit while still inside the womb! And if you keep reading, in verse 41 we see that as baby John leaps at Mary's greeting, Elizabeth is filled with the Holy Spirit! How awesome is that!
One of my all time favorites :) John 16:13 & 14
But when He the Spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all the truth; for He will not speak on His own initiative, but whatever He hears, He will speak; and He will disclose to you what is to come. He will glorify Me, for He will take of Mine and disclose it to you. Wow, the Holy Spirit is amazing isn't it?!
Acts 8 tells the awesome story of Philip and the eunuch. Verse 39 and 40 are especially awesome :) “When they came up out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord snatched Philip away; and the eunuch no longer saw him, but went on his way rejoicing. But Philip found himself at Azotus, and as he passed through he kept preaching the gospel to all the cities until he came to Caesarea.” How cool is that!? I want the Holy Spirit to be able to do those kind of things with me!
Then at the end of Acts 10, the holy spirit falls upon all those that are listening to Peter's message. (verse 44). The gift of the Holy Spirit was poured upon them all, and they were speaking in tongues and exalting God. Thereafter, they order them to be baptized in water since they obviously received the same Holy Spirit just as the apostles did! (verse 47 and 48). I just think that's awesome! To have that kind of anointing that your words cause the Holy Spirit to fall on those that hear them!
Romans 8 is a really deep chapter...there is a lot to take in. It's kind of the different aspect of the Holy Spirit. How as believers, we are new creations and must die to our flesh and live by the Spirit. I also like verse 26: “In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” I think that's awesome!
Okay, I guess this can be the last section, I know there is alot! :)
1st Corinthians 2:9-16. I think this is a really good portion of scripture for all believers to meditate and prayer read.
“But just as it is written, things which eye has not seen and ear has not heard, and which have not entered the heart of man, all that God has prepared for those who love Him. For to us God revealed them through the Spirit; for the Spirit searches all things even the depths of God” Wow, does anyone else realize this is incredibly deep. The Holy Spirit searches the depths of God and reveals those secrets to US. Think about that for a moment! What an incredible gift, honor, and privilege!
Continuing on in scripture: “For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the spirit of the man which is in him? Even so the thoughts of God no one knows except the Spirit of God. Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, so that we may know the things freely given to us by God, which things we also speak, not in words taught by human wisdom, but in those taught by the Spirit, combining spiritual thoughts with spiritual words. But a natural man does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually appraised. But he who is spiritual appraises all things, yet he himself is appraised by no one. For WHO HAS KNOWN THE MIND OF THE LORD, THAT HE WILL INSTRUCT HIM? But we have the mind of Christ.” As believers, we must not only be ready for unbelievers to see us and the things that we believe as foolishness, we should expect it and welcome it when it comes. The Kingdom of Heaven does not operate like the Kingdom of this Earth, and praise the Lord for that! What a nightmare it would be if it did...We also need to be careful that never try to instruct the Lord as to what he should or shouldn't do, that is just never our place...
Well I suppose I am done for now...I am just drinking this all in...seriously, how could I ever have been bored of reading the Bible?!?!?!
Monday, October 6, 2008
Thoughts/excerpts from Patricia King's "Spiritual Revolution"
I have been reading an eye-opening book by Patricia King called “Spiritual Revolution.” I am learning so much and I definitely recommend it to anyone hungry for more of the supernatural in your life! This book talks about all kinds of things like angelic visitations, visions, miracles, hearing the voice of the Lord in different ways, and “third heaven” experiences. You may be a little doubtful of some things at first but she is so genuine in her experiences and uses scripture constantly to back up the things she believes. I love the way she talks about living by faith. Here are some of the passages that I wanted to share with you.
In the beginning of the book, she talks about the different types of supernatural occurrences that are happening today, all over the world. But she starts out focusing on the evil ones, from the Kingdom of darkness. We, as the body of Christ have a responsibility to give a true example of the supernatural!
“These true signs and wonders will be the standard raised up against the flood of the counterfeit demonic outpouring. We must walk in the true in order to expose and swallow up the false.” She talks about the “sad reality that of those that believe that God's power is real today, very few are actually operating in much of it at all, including herself.” I began to understand a bigger purpose for the supernatural, for signs and wonders. I always had a hunger for these things but now I understand that it goes beyond a hunger to be satisfied in myself. As a follower of Christ I have a responsibility to display the true supernatural realm of the Kingdom of heaven to expose how evil the works of the enemy are. We cannot simply talk about how terrible the things are that the enemy does through the occult and other practices, we must fight back. Satan is creating counterfeits, but what about the true originals?! We must keep them alive, instead of shrinking away from anything supernatural in fear. She challenges us believers with these questions: “ Again, how will we ever learn to discern the counterfeit if we are not familiar with the real thing? How will the unsaved ever embrace the truth if they only know the false?”
She talks about the vital importance of experiencing God versus simply reading about him in His Word.
“Successful and meaningful relationships are based on a choice to love as well as to experience that love. If you were to take the experience dimension out of a relationship, you would more than likely be left with a cold and empty association and not a relationship at all. If you were to read the biography of the President of the United Stares, it doesn't mean that you have a relationship with him. It simply means you know about him. If you had coffee with him, however, or went for a walk with him, or allowed him to take you on a personal tour of the White House, then you could perhaps say that you had a small measure of relationship with him. What makes the difference? It is the experience dimension. The more experience you share with someone, the deeper your relationship becomes.”
“He would be so disappointed if we said “Reading the Bible is all I need. I can find everything I need to know about You, Lord, through Your Word. It doesn't matter to me if I experience Your love, presence, or power.” This would break His heart, for He longs to give us experience with Him and to receive our love as well. He is a relational God. When He was suffering on the cross, He had an expectation. He endured the cross for the joy set before Him. Experiencing an eternal love relationship with you is that joy.”
Wow, I just had never heard things said quite this way before, but it makes SO much sense!! How heartbreaking is it that we are letting ourselves, as the body of Christ, be satisfied with knowing about God instead of experiencing Him as a person!
She also approaches it from the opposite standpoint and cautions “Experience orientation is valid if it has a place of right priority within your heart. Experience, for the sake of experience, however, has no eternal value at all, and the idolatry of it could possibly lead to great deception. Experience in knowing Him, His Kingdom, and His Righteousness, however, is our upward call in Christ Jesus.”
Anyways, I have already written lots here....didn't even write nearly everything I wanted too... But hopefully it will give you more encouragement to be seeking after the supernatural and experiencing the one true God!
I love you guys!
In the beginning of the book, she talks about the different types of supernatural occurrences that are happening today, all over the world. But she starts out focusing on the evil ones, from the Kingdom of darkness. We, as the body of Christ have a responsibility to give a true example of the supernatural!
“These true signs and wonders will be the standard raised up against the flood of the counterfeit demonic outpouring. We must walk in the true in order to expose and swallow up the false.” She talks about the “sad reality that of those that believe that God's power is real today, very few are actually operating in much of it at all, including herself.” I began to understand a bigger purpose for the supernatural, for signs and wonders. I always had a hunger for these things but now I understand that it goes beyond a hunger to be satisfied in myself. As a follower of Christ I have a responsibility to display the true supernatural realm of the Kingdom of heaven to expose how evil the works of the enemy are. We cannot simply talk about how terrible the things are that the enemy does through the occult and other practices, we must fight back. Satan is creating counterfeits, but what about the true originals?! We must keep them alive, instead of shrinking away from anything supernatural in fear. She challenges us believers with these questions: “ Again, how will we ever learn to discern the counterfeit if we are not familiar with the real thing? How will the unsaved ever embrace the truth if they only know the false?”
She talks about the vital importance of experiencing God versus simply reading about him in His Word.
“Successful and meaningful relationships are based on a choice to love as well as to experience that love. If you were to take the experience dimension out of a relationship, you would more than likely be left with a cold and empty association and not a relationship at all. If you were to read the biography of the President of the United Stares, it doesn't mean that you have a relationship with him. It simply means you know about him. If you had coffee with him, however, or went for a walk with him, or allowed him to take you on a personal tour of the White House, then you could perhaps say that you had a small measure of relationship with him. What makes the difference? It is the experience dimension. The more experience you share with someone, the deeper your relationship becomes.”
“He would be so disappointed if we said “Reading the Bible is all I need. I can find everything I need to know about You, Lord, through Your Word. It doesn't matter to me if I experience Your love, presence, or power.” This would break His heart, for He longs to give us experience with Him and to receive our love as well. He is a relational God. When He was suffering on the cross, He had an expectation. He endured the cross for the joy set before Him. Experiencing an eternal love relationship with you is that joy.”
Wow, I just had never heard things said quite this way before, but it makes SO much sense!! How heartbreaking is it that we are letting ourselves, as the body of Christ, be satisfied with knowing about God instead of experiencing Him as a person!
She also approaches it from the opposite standpoint and cautions “Experience orientation is valid if it has a place of right priority within your heart. Experience, for the sake of experience, however, has no eternal value at all, and the idolatry of it could possibly lead to great deception. Experience in knowing Him, His Kingdom, and His Righteousness, however, is our upward call in Christ Jesus.”
Anyways, I have already written lots here....didn't even write nearly everything I wanted too... But hopefully it will give you more encouragement to be seeking after the supernatural and experiencing the one true God!
I love you guys!
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Some deeper, personal thoughts from my journal...
The majority of my blogging has been talking about the teachings and classes, but I wanted to share some deeper things...Here are some prayers/songs that I have in my journal from the past couple of days...
I have really been feeling the Lord has a higher destiny for my life than I had previously been imagining. I am not sure what it all looks like right now, but I just know there is more than I thought. Much higher than going to college and just becoming a nutritionist for the rest of my life. More than getting married and having a family. Even if it is just for a season, I know I want to do more with my life. I feel such a longing and desire to be involved in “ministry,” a discipling ministry that involves a lot of intercession and counseling. I feel such a desire to make a difference for Christ – to the lost but also to the saved. I would love to be involved in something where there is community living with fellow believers, edification and discipling fellow believers, and reaching out to the Lost together...my mind has run wild with the ideas of what that could look like. Lord, because I trust you, I place everything at your throne. Father, my destiny with you, the plan you have for me comes first in my life. All my dreams, plans, passions, desires, and relationship with Jordan come after that. In these three months I hope and pray that I discover more of the calling you have placed on my life. I can only trust that the changes that will occur in my heart, and have started already, will mesh with those that occur in Jordan's...but what if they don't...I place that in your all knowing perfect hands, Jesus. Right now, my focus and worry so to speak is on myself and what you are calling me to do...and Lord willing it will line up with what you are calling Jordan to. Father, teach me your ways, show me your perfectly designed path. I love your ways Lord, you are an awesome God! My deepest desire is to respond in complete obedience to the callings on my life, whatever and wherever they may be.
Prayer-reading the Song of Solomon 1:2
Oh Father, I'm begging you
Kiss me with the kisses of your love
the kisses of your word
kisses of your goodness
kisses of your holiness
kisses of your gentleness
kisses of your patience
For your love oh God is better than wine. It is better than the pleasures of this world. Better than Jordan's love. Better than acceptance and self-confidence. Your love, oh God, is better than everything.
Thank you for your love father. Thank you for how passionately you love me, speak to me, and care for me. Make your love known to the depths of who I am. The depths of my heart. Give me more insight and revelation on how you love me.
Meditating on Matthew 5:1-6...
Father open your mouth and begin to teach me. How can I be hungry and thirsty for righteousness? Hunger demands attention, even if completely unintentional. Hunger drives you to the source of fullfillment. To ache for the Lord and more of His presence, more of his word, more likeness of Him. To live as though you will quickly die, physically, without the food of the Lord. Priority is very high because it is essential for life to continue. Without it, death will result...
Lord help me to be driven by my hunger for you. Not to satisfy it in other ways or to ignore the “spiritual growls of my stomach.” Give me more hunger. Increase my appetite for your word, your ways, and the person of Jesus. Give me more revelation of what it means to HUNGER and THIRST for righteousness.
I kinda wrote a song using that scripture...
FATHER, TEACH ME YOUR WAYS
OPEN YOUR MOUTH, FOR I AM LISTENING
TEACH ME YOUR WAYS
TO BE POOR IN SPIRIT, KNOWING HOW TO MOURN
TEACH ME GENTLENESS, LIKE JESUS
MAKE ME HUNGRY FOR YOU, FOR RIGHTEOUSNESS
Another song I wrote...
I will be patient
In the quiet place
to hear your voice
your tender voice
In the stillness
I will be still
to hear you
hear your voice, speak to me
I wait for you
when I don't feel near
in silence I will wait
to hear from you
I will wait (2x)
I have really been feeling the Lord has a higher destiny for my life than I had previously been imagining. I am not sure what it all looks like right now, but I just know there is more than I thought. Much higher than going to college and just becoming a nutritionist for the rest of my life. More than getting married and having a family. Even if it is just for a season, I know I want to do more with my life. I feel such a longing and desire to be involved in “ministry,” a discipling ministry that involves a lot of intercession and counseling. I feel such a desire to make a difference for Christ – to the lost but also to the saved. I would love to be involved in something where there is community living with fellow believers, edification and discipling fellow believers, and reaching out to the Lost together...my mind has run wild with the ideas of what that could look like. Lord, because I trust you, I place everything at your throne. Father, my destiny with you, the plan you have for me comes first in my life. All my dreams, plans, passions, desires, and relationship with Jordan come after that. In these three months I hope and pray that I discover more of the calling you have placed on my life. I can only trust that the changes that will occur in my heart, and have started already, will mesh with those that occur in Jordan's...but what if they don't...I place that in your all knowing perfect hands, Jesus. Right now, my focus and worry so to speak is on myself and what you are calling me to do...and Lord willing it will line up with what you are calling Jordan to. Father, teach me your ways, show me your perfectly designed path. I love your ways Lord, you are an awesome God! My deepest desire is to respond in complete obedience to the callings on my life, whatever and wherever they may be.
Prayer-reading the Song of Solomon 1:2
Oh Father, I'm begging you
Kiss me with the kisses of your love
the kisses of your word
kisses of your goodness
kisses of your holiness
kisses of your gentleness
kisses of your patience
For your love oh God is better than wine. It is better than the pleasures of this world. Better than Jordan's love. Better than acceptance and self-confidence. Your love, oh God, is better than everything.
Thank you for your love father. Thank you for how passionately you love me, speak to me, and care for me. Make your love known to the depths of who I am. The depths of my heart. Give me more insight and revelation on how you love me.
Meditating on Matthew 5:1-6...
Father open your mouth and begin to teach me. How can I be hungry and thirsty for righteousness? Hunger demands attention, even if completely unintentional. Hunger drives you to the source of fullfillment. To ache for the Lord and more of His presence, more of his word, more likeness of Him. To live as though you will quickly die, physically, without the food of the Lord. Priority is very high because it is essential for life to continue. Without it, death will result...
Lord help me to be driven by my hunger for you. Not to satisfy it in other ways or to ignore the “spiritual growls of my stomach.” Give me more hunger. Increase my appetite for your word, your ways, and the person of Jesus. Give me more revelation of what it means to HUNGER and THIRST for righteousness.
I kinda wrote a song using that scripture...
FATHER, TEACH ME YOUR WAYS
OPEN YOUR MOUTH, FOR I AM LISTENING
TEACH ME YOUR WAYS
TO BE POOR IN SPIRIT, KNOWING HOW TO MOURN
TEACH ME GENTLENESS, LIKE JESUS
MAKE ME HUNGRY FOR YOU, FOR RIGHTEOUSNESS
Another song I wrote...
I will be patient
In the quiet place
to hear your voice
your tender voice
In the stillness
I will be still
to hear you
hear your voice, speak to me
I wait for you
when I don't feel near
in silence I will wait
to hear from you
I will wait (2x)
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